Another Transition

This is our Christmas card which was just sent out today! Next year our card will just say "Have a nice day" on it so that it will be relevant no matter when it goes out. I must say that I do have a pretty talented husband who designed it himself.

After we sent out our yearly update we started making a transition. Below are the details of what's been going on since we sent out our letter:

Once again Bethany and I find ourselves in the midst of transition. It seems no matter what we do life just seems to keep getting busier and busier. We have let our boss know we are going to start looking for a new job and we are planning on moving away from GAP Ministries, Lord willing. I would love to keep working for GAP but we have decided the schedule has taken too much of a toll on something we really enjoy in life; fellowship time with friends. We hope to have some more routine in our lives. Especially a time when we can sit still before our God and King in adoration.

We also just recently found out that the state of AZ will not be able to fund the ministry due to budget issues at the state level. We will therefore not be paid in the month of February and possibly after. This puts a huge strain on all of us, as you can imagine. We are thankful for the wisdom of several people who encouraged us to start a savings account a long time ago so that we will be able to pay rent and bills even during this time.

Prayers: Please lift us up as we begin to look for jobs. Many of our friends have taken several months to find jobs and have not found jobs they enjoy. Bethany has started to wonder if she will be able to ever stay home and raise kids because her husband did not acquire a college degree which lends itself towards cash flow. So please pray God will provide as we seek to make room to put God first, family second, and ministry after the first two. Pray the remainder of our time here at GAP is spent intentionally serving God with each day He gives us. Please also pray for GAP during this financial hardship.

Praises: As we fight off anxiety about this next transition we are able to look around and count our blessings. I have been given an incredibly wonderful spouse, a nicely furnished apartment, and we have begun to put money into savings. On our walls we see pictures of loved ones and God reminds me that my life is in good hands, His big hands. I am grateful right now that my life is not in my hands for I have seen that on my own I can bring nothing good into my life.

Last night we got to witness two friends of ours sharing the gospel with dozens of Spanish people in a trailer park. The best part about it was the foster kids were playing a part in the ministry! Praise God! It was one of those moments I could feel and see God working close by. It is a good feeling to know the God of the universe who made you is at work and is close. I wish it was a more common experience.

Zion National Park

The following post is long overdue and this trip happened in November of '09.

Bethany and I got to take a trip to Zion National Park in Utah with her parents. We happened to go while it was autumn in Zion and the leaves were changing colors. The yellow leaves combined with a brilliant blue sky made for some really nice pictures as you can see above. Even walking around the park I felt as if I was in a movie. One part of the valley made me think of the Land Before Time movie I watched when I was a kid. The dinosaurs finally found this heavenly valley with flowing streams. It seemed like we had found a similar valley when we climbed to the end of one of the trails and turned around.

Bethany and I also took a second shot at gambling at the resort where we stayed with her parents and sadly we lost money on this round. I overheard some of the gambling lingo while I was in the rest room. It seems there is one question everyone asks each other as they walk around the casino. They say, “Are you up or down?” Then everyone would reply, “I'm down.” Sometimes they would say, “I was up for the first hour, now I am down.” I guess everyone was just at emotional low points.

Praises: God made an awesome place for us to visit!

Eric's Thoughts

Probably my greatest heartfelt desire is to know God. I ask myself what can I do to know Christ? Paul considers everything a loss compared to knowing God [Philippians 3:8] and Jesus prays for believers, “Now this is eternal life: that they may know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom you have sent.” [John 17:3] But how does someone get to know God? What does the Bible say about the process?

The first and greatest commandment is to love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, and mind. And the second is like it: love your neighbor as yourself. [Matthew 22:36-40] For several months now I believe I have swapped these two commandments. I have made the first and greatest commandment to love my neighbor as myself. I have given into the American tendency towards busyness and simply doing a lot. I have put my job to love the kids in my care as my first priority. I spend half my waking hours discipling/parenting youth and trying to teach them to obey everything Christ commanded [Matthew 28] but the other half of those hours are not spent focusing on loving God with all my heart. Not even close.

There is a certain aspect of love for others and obedience to Christian commands that translate as love for God and knowing Him better so this seems to be working in my favor. See the verses below:

If you obey my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have obeyed my Father's commands and remain in his love...My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. [John 15:10, 12]

If anyone loves me, he will obey my teaching. My Father will love him, and we will come to him and make our home with him. [John 14:23]

For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me and for the gospel will save it. [Mark 8:35]

"Then the righteous will answer him, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?' The King will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.”
[Matthew 25:37-40]

Whoever serves me must follow me; and where I am, my servant also will be. My Father will honor the one who serves me. [John 12:26]

Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world. [James 1:27]

There are certainly many other verses which mention what we should do as Christians. Romans 12 is a whole chapter about such actions. But as we return to the summary of the law and the prophets we see the greatest commandment is to love God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind. It does not say to divide half of that love to give to your neighbor. Scripture says I should, “Fix my eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of my faith” [Hebrews 12:2] It seems I should focus all my energy and love on God and trust that as I do that, the desire to love my neighbor, speak to him about the gospel, and disciple the fatherless will emerge. Below are more verses which mention the pursuit of God:

And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him. [Hebrews 11:6]

You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. [Jeremiah 29:13]

Come near to God and he will come near to you. [James 4:8]
Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart. [Psalm 37:4]

Bethany and I have made sacrifices (they feel like great sacrifices) to try to live our lives to know God by tackling a daunting Christian “To-Do” list. But in this we have certainly had moments when we loose sight of God and just get caught up in all the horizontal work which needs to get done to build God's kingdom. I find myself becoming impatient and frustrated. I end up focusing all my energy on doing things for God and then I sit back like Jonah and say, “Okay God, now do your part” instead of humbly waiting on an infinitely wise and loving God, who is in absolute control. My attitude towards God is “I'm doing what you said to do, so let me see the fruit you promised.” Again my American mentality shows up because I want instant results. I want to see instant fruit from my work. I don't want to have to wait to find out if God is going to bless my efforts. I don't trust Him to work all things out for the good of those who love Him. I need to humbly say before God, “I will walk in obedience and do my part because YOU have a plan and I will wait and trust to see what YOU will do in YOUR infinite wisdom and goodness.” My impatience for results shows I have a lack of trust in God. I have wanted to put myself at God's level and at times in God's shoes and at times on His throne. I need to let the King of Kings and Lord of Lords, the Lamb Who Was Slain sit in power and wisdom on His throne.

As I continue to look at scripture and the example Jesus laid for us, I see Jesus leaving the crowds to pursue his Father in prayer [Luke 5:15-17]. I do not withdraw from crowds to pray, instead I repeatedly forfeit time in prayer to attend to people. The curtain is torn because of Christ's blood so that we may enter the Holy of Holies [Hebrews 10]. I spend time going out and about telling others about the greatness of the Holy of Holies but I forget what it is like to rest there in His majesty.

I believe a renewed emphasis on prayer will help me remember my place before God. It is recorded that Jesus did not focus all his time on horizontal goals for the people around him. He did only what the Father would have him do and what he saw the Father doing [John 5:19]. Part of this I believe was Jesus' focus on prayer. When he didn't want to go to the cross he went to the Father in prayer [Matthew 26:36]. When he was about to choose the twelve disciples he went to the Father in prayer [Luke 6:12]. The disciples waited and prayed after Jesus ascended to heaven so they could be clothed with power from the Holy Spirit [Acts 1,2]. The verses below also highlight a focus on prayer:

Hebrews 5:7
During the days of Jesus' life on earth, he offered up prayers and petitions with loud cries and tears to the one who could save him from death, and he was heard because of his reverent submission.

Mark 1:35
Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where he prayed.

Matthew 19:13
Then little children were brought to Jesus for him to place his hands on them and pray for them.

Luke 5:15-17
Yet the news about him spread all the more, so that crowds of people came to hear him and to be healed of their sicknesses. But Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed.

Luke 6:12
One of those days Jesus went out to a mountainside to pray, and spent the night praying to God. When morning came, he called his disciples to him and chose twelve of them.

Luke 9:28
About eight days after Jesus said this, he took Peter, John and James with him and went up onto a mountain to pray.

Luke 18:1
Then Jesus told his disciples a parable to show them that they should always pray and not give up.

Romans 12:12
Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.

Ephesians 6: 18-20
And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints. Pray also for me, that whenever I open my mouth, words may be given me so that I will fearlessly make known the mystery of the gospel, for which I am an ambassador in chains. Pray that I may declare it fearlessly, as I should.

Philippians 4:6
Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.

Colossians 4:2
Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful.

1 Thessalonians 5:16-18
Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.

1 Timothy 2:8
I want men everywhere to lift up holy hands in prayer, without anger or disputing.

James 5:13-18
Is any one of you in trouble? He should pray. Is anyone happy? Let him sing songs of praise. Is any one of you sick? He should call the elders of the church to pray over him and anoint him with oil in the name of the Lord. And the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well; the Lord will raise him up. If he has sinned, he will be forgiven. Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.
Elijah was a man just like us. He prayed earnestly that it would not rain, and it did not rain on the land for three and a half years. Again he prayed, and the heavens gave rain, and the earth produced its crops.

Jude 1:20
But you, dear friends, build yourselves up in your most holy faith and pray in the Holy Spirit.

Luke 11:13
If you then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!

Before each respite and 120 hour marathon of ministry and discipleship begins I think Bethany and I need to make the continuous and conscience effort to come before our Heavenly Father in dialogue with Him. We are guilty of practicing self sufficiency and we are guilty of focusing too much on the work to be done rather than on resting in His care and love for us. Here are some further quotes highlighting the importance of prayer:

"It is in the field of prayer that life's critical battles are lost or won. We must conquer all our circumstances there. We must first of all bring them there. We must survey them there. We must master them there. In prayer we bring our spiritual enemies into the Presence of God and we fight them there. Have you tried that? Or have you been satisfied to meet and fight your foes in the open spaces of the world?" J. H. Jowett

"Prayer is the first thing, the second thing, the third thing necessary to a minister. Pray, then my dear brother; pray, pray, pray." Edward Payson

"Each time, before you intercede, be quiet first, and worship God in His glory. Think of what He can do, and how He delights to hear the prayers of His redeemed people. Think of your place and privilege in Christ, and expect great things!" Andrew Murray

Prayers: Our job seems to emphasize our spiritual workload and Christian “To-Do list” so much that we have neglected to put the first commandment first. Bethany and I need to orient our life, schedule and priorities to love our God with all our heart, all our soul, and mind. I believe a focus on coming before our Father in prayer will help us do this. Please pray for us in this.

Praises: I have brought this to the attention of my care group and they continue to provide strength, revelation, love, encouragement, and focus to keep Bethany and I on track! Despite my impatience, God has shown Himself to be faithful to us over and over again.